The Inside-Out Approach to Lasting Positive Change
The hard part of any change is not knowing what to do, or even doing it. It's making it last. What if there were a method to help you uplevel continually? Here are some lessons learned.
There are a lot of us out there who want to do everything, have everything, and be everything to everyone. Who want to be better people and to improve our lives. And we're good at—at least at first, but keeping change going over the long haul gets rough. It's so easy to fall prey to old cycles and to constantly start over again.
How can we design a life that enables continuous, positive, lasting change? One where there is room to be grateful and present and to exercise and sleep and achieve goals? Where being joyful and happy mix with being engaged in the world and doing something meaningful?
I spent most of my life disconnected, hustling, struggling to be fully here. I've always been good at jumping off the cliff, trying something new. But then I'd get restless and move on. When I hit forty, I had a new husband (the second), a new baby, a new business—and I followed up with two miscarriages, early menopause, autoimmune disease, bum knees. Just when I needed more time, more energy, and more of everything, I was exhausted, unable to play with my daughter at the end of the day. I had no edge at work. I longed to sleep a whole night through. I begged for it. Change seemed out of the question.
Over more than a decade that has followed, I have spent literally thousands of hours figuring out how to release untapped energy and make a lasting change in my life.
This is What I Learned
Energy, not time, is what gets us out of survival mode. It’s not about drinking more coffee, or doing another wellness program. It’s not about time management or digital detoxes. It’s about optimizing our own ecosystem to create the conditions for the best version of ourselves to emerge.
Self-development isn't enough. We need to connect the body and mind. We need to totally rethink how we approach resiliency and embrace radical self-care as a non-negotiable. This will give us energy. When we fine-tune our biochemistry, it's possible to maximize energy and mental clarity. And when we calm the nervous system, it's possible to handle stress to get more done.
And lasting change always starts from a deep embodied sense of who we are. We tend to forget that the head is part of that body and both work together. So the first step consists of reconnecting the body and mind. When we start to listen deeply to our own bodies, to our own needs, we develop a deep understanding of who we really are and start to trust ourselves.
Taking small steps consistently for body/mind well-being brings improvements that come in sometimes tiny, almost imperceptible intervals, spiralling up, compounding into profound change.
Setting priorities won't cut it. Balance is elusive, a moving target that requires constant readjustment from a whole-person perspective. Building tailored, flexible systems helps, as does being attentive to the full ecosystem so that it contributes to overall equilibrium rather than disturbing it. Daily habits and an environment that supports vitality without limiting enjoyment are both powerful tools to help settle positive change in over the long term.
It’s an inside-out job. It starts with us, and then it’s about how we connect to the world around us. What meaning do we bring to our life? To feel good in body and mind, and keep a sense of balance and resilience over time, it is central to align with our aspirations, values and purpose. These are the threads that hold all the pieces together, allowing us to imaging future possibilities, to connect with optimism, and to navigate the world around us. Whole.
How to Make Lasting Change
The end result is a three-step method. You reboot. You rebalance. You reconnect. Then you start over again. I've streamlined it for you at Potentializer Academy.
“You may not feel outstandingly robust, but if you are an average-sized adult you will contain within your modest frame no less than 7 × 1018 joules of potential energy—enough to explode with the force of thirty very large hydrogen bombs, assuming you knew how to liberate it and really wished to make a point.”